It hurts when you discover that not everyone has your best interests at heart. So you must learn to be more discerning, and know on what level to interact with people. Usually only a few people belong in your inner circle. That’s why you must be wise when it comes to who you allow into that circle.

We see this illustrated in the lives of David and Jonathan. David was at odds with King Saul, the father of his best friend, Jonathan. Jonathan kept David’s secrets and protected him with his very life, even when faced with displeasing his own family. Jonathan wasn’t seeking to elevate himself, inflate his own self-importance, or orchestrate his own advancement through his relationship with David. Simply stated, they had a ‘soul connection’.

The strength of a confidant lies in their silence. If someone’s a gossiper, they automatically disqualify themselves. We must be able to rest in the security of these relationships, in order to express ourselves, gather information, and glean wise counsel. Otherwise, we reap the consequences of having the wrong people know too much about us.

Confidants not only maintain our secrets, they refuse to exploit that privileged information for their own gain. They really care about us, and don’t throw our past mistakes in our face. They refuse to utter the words ‘I told you so’. Such people are in your life for the long haul, and you must recognise and cherish them.